Characters

Antony

   MARCUS ANTONY, the boy from Malenium, is young, good-looking, charismatic, adventurous, innovative, ambitious ' and on a mission to introduce his remarkable inventions to the world. All he needs is to secure imperial patronage and Roman citizenship. But he's also helplessly trusting and naive, and in no time falls into the treacherous clutches of Statilia, wife of Nero. Promised fame fortune and imperial power, Mark Antony is over the moon. Thanks to an encounter with a beautiful slave girl, CLEO, our hero realizes Eternal Rome is a cesspit of greed and corruption. The lovers escape from a devastating fire that brings the citizenry to its knees. Atonement, hope and promise of restoration of a better world are Antony and Cleo's final gifts to what remains the Eternal City.

Cleo

   Statilia's beautiful personal Nubian slave girl is dutiful and obedient. To behave otherwise would mean certain death. Survival depends on anonymity. As a human being she's unobtrusive to the point of invisibility. 'Just a shadow in the night', as the songs says. It takes a stranger like MARK ANTONY to elicit her name, CLEO, unearth her aristocratic background ' and discover her secret life as an undercover agent in the imperial palace.

Donnabella

   As the wife of Hilarius, she and her friend Octavia are luminaries in Rome's corrupt society and celebrants of the Age of Decadence. Promiscuity and adultery are all the rage. Their choice of lovers is limited only by class considerations. Plebeians and ordinary centurions definitely unacceptable - and woe betide any respectable matron who crosses the line.

Hidius

   Step-brother of Scrufulus and Promiscuis, they represent an underclass of nihilists who are out to destroy the universe. Their signature song makes it clear:

'Trash, bash, slash and smash, Obliteration, devastation
That's the world we wanna to see, That's the place we wanna be!'

Hilarius

 As an influential Senator, he and his counterpart Ludicrus are gob-smacked to learn from Mark Antony that one of them is the young man's father. Unlike Mini and Maxi, this pair is shrewd, unscrupulous, and is also plotting to overthrow Nero. Their attempt to involve Mark Antony in their devious plans lures the innocent newcomer into a wider conspiracy, but also gets him onto the steep learning curve he urgently needs for survival.

Lucretia

  Daughter of NERO and STATILIA, she's in total rebellion against her parents, against adults, against established authority, against discipline in any form and life in general. Her only relief from overwhelming boredom is in sexual adventurism and hanging out on the wild side with her punk stepbrothers Scrufulus, Hidius and Promiscuis, who together complete the truly dysfunctional NERO FAMILY.

Ludicrus

    As an influential Senator, he and his counterpart Hilarius are gob-smacked to learn from Mark Antony that one of them is the young man's father. Unlike Mini and Maxi, this pair is shrewd, unscrupulous, and is also plotting to overthrow Nero. Their attempt to involve Mark Antony in their devious plans lures the innocent newcomer into a wider conspiracy, but also gets him onto the steep learning curve he urgently needs for survival.

Maximus

   MAXI and MINI are Roman Senators plotting to bring down NERO. Their problem is they're incapable of organizing a piss-up in a brewery - never mind take over the Roman Empire. Maxi is the less silly of the two, more astute and constantly exasperated by Mini's inability to grasp fundamental issues. Together they provide ancient Rome's answer to Laurel and Hardy, or Bud Abbott and Lou Costello.

Messenger

 A small role for a tenor who comes in at the end of Act 2 with a group of African warriors, bringing the good news from Antony and Cleo.

Minimus

 MAXI and MINI are Roman Senators plotting to bring down NERO. Their problem is they're incapable of organizing a piss-up in a brewery - never mind take over the Roman Empire. Maxi is the less silly of the two, more astute and constantly exasperated by Mini's inability to grasp fundamental issues. Together they provide ancient Rome's answer to Laurel and Hardy, or Bud Abbott and Lou Costello.

Nero

  Now in his dotage, NERO has convinced himself ' in the way of all tyrants ' that all his brutal behaviour was for the common good and history will be kind to him. In fact old age has softened the old bugger to the point of upholding democratic principles and opting for the much more exciting role of marketing the world's first bicycle.

Octavia

   As the wife of Ludicrus, she and her friend Donabella are luminaries in Rome's corrupt society and celebrants of the Age of Decadence. Promiscuity and adultery are all the rage. Their choice of lovers is limited only by class considerations. Plebeians and ordinary centurions definitely unacceptable - and woe betide any respectable matron who crosses the line.

Oraculus

  Certified clairvoyant or cheeky charlatan? Whatever ORIE's seen or experienced in life it certainly hasn't rendered him an optimist. Blind he may be, but he clearly sees the downside of current social and political developments ' and tells it like it is. Revered by some and despised by many, he's consistent in his pessimism and unwaveringly loyal to his Scottish confidant, Johnny Walker.

Scorpio

     Step-brother of Scrufulus and Hidius, they represent an underclass of nihilists who are out to destroy the universe. Their signature song makes it clear:

'Trash, bash, slash and smash, Obliteration, devastation
That's the world we wanna to see, That's the place we wanna be!'

Scrufulus

   Nero's son and heir to the throne and his step-brothers Hidius and Promiscuis represent an underclass of nihilists who are out to destroy the universe. Their signature song makes it clear:

'Trash, bash, slash and smash, Obliteration, devastation
That's the world we wanna to see, That's the place we wanna be!'

Statilia

   STATILIA is one wicked lady. There is no end to the dastardly deeds she'll perpetrate to achieve her objective of becoming head honcho of the Roman Empire and the most powerful woman on earth. If this requires liquidating competitors like Ludi and Hills, drowning her step-son and heir apparent, SCRUFULUS, marrying Marcus Antony to her nymphomaniac daughter LUCRETIA and poisoning hubby NEFARIUS NERO ' well, no problem!